Week 38: Notes from daddy

A few things the daddy-to-be has learned over the past 38 weeks:

1) Don't do anything to piss off mommy.
2) To best view the baby in motion, look from mommy's vantage point.
3) Leave manhandling the belly to the doctors.
4) Singing to the baby is just plain wierd.
5) When mommy sneezes, offer her some toilet paper.
6) Don't ever point out that her memory has gone to shit.
7) Don't be suprised if you wake up one morning and you can't find a plate. Chances are mommy was nesting.
8) Mommy's bigger boobs are not a toy.
9) Leave shopping at Babies R Us to the girls.
10) Have a back up plan in place for sleeping in case one of mommy's 8 pillows smother you.
11) Be ontime for the ultrasound and don't forget to videotape it.
12) And if all else fails, just give mommy some chocolate.

So here is a little update: We had the version on Tuesday and it was indeed uncomfortable (though they gave me a yummy chicken salad sandwich on wheat bread afterwards). It was also unsuccessful. Melia's head is still up, butt firmly implanted in the pelvis, and legs straight up in the air. Ho hum. Time to schedule the C-Section. If Kaiser Oakland has their way, the baby will be born on June 19th as this is the only "time slot" available the entire month of June. Gee, glad to know that Melia's birthdate will be chosen for her. How about we choose her eye and hair color while we are at it. The 19th is not a good day for anyone involved, except Kaiser, so we are going to try and find an "appointment" at another Kaiser facility. We will keep you posted.